I’m back.

Yes, I should have been writing all along, considering I was home on bed rest most of the month of December through my pregnancy. But, most days I didn’t feel the greatest and other days I had contractions all the time so it made for not wanting to write a whole lot!

However, our lives have changed completely and it’s time for the new mom to document this since Uncle Pat, Grandpa Steve, and the new daddy have done so.

Cameron Patrick Lemke was born on January 11, 2006 at 10:11 a.m. It had been a long 6 weeks leading up to the big day, but it has been worth every bit. It’s been a huge adjustment for me, but I’m getting there and am appreciating this special time that he and I have together at home. As my mom told me, and she is so right, they are only this age once. I want to remember as much of it as I can.

December 1st started out with me waking up with contractions. My due date was January 6th, so I wasn’t quite sure what I was feeling. I stayed home from work and called the birthing center at our hospital and described what they termed as ‘pre-labor’ symptoms. The contractions were manageable, but coming about 5-6 minutes apart. They said I should come in, so I took a shower and drove myself to St. Paul. I think in my mind I was really feeling like this was all in my head and I was being overly cautious. However, when I was hooked up to the machines, they found I was having contractions that were irregular, but 6-8 minutes apart. They also heard an irregular heart beat on the baby.

I was concerned, but since I wasn’t dilating, I didn’t freak out for some reason. They gave me a shot to stop the contractions, fed me, and sent me home to rest and visit my doctor the following day. I followed orders, but came home feeling a bit nervous that the baby’s room wasn’t finished!

The following morning Madison woke me at 5am to go outside. Not uncommon, but she kept staring at me like something was up. She knew something before I did. The contractions hit at around 5:30am, and this time they were 3-5 minutes and painful. I told Mike and he elected to stay home and see what was happening. We called the hospital again, and they told us to come in. Same routine-gave me a shot and on to the doctor I went in the afternoon. She then told me it was bed rest and medication for 2 weeks until I could get to 37 weeks.

I called work, let them know what was up, and told them I would be able to come to my shower at work the following Tuesday and wrap up what I could since we now were wondering if I would even make it that far. I spent the weekend taking it as easy as I could and getting up now and then. (It was only moderate bed rest so I could get up and do some stuff.)

By this point I am now looking like a large elephant, with swollen feet and ankles. I couldn’t sleep more then a few hours at a time, and I was snoring, so I slept in the guest room a lot and would get up each day at 5am with Madison and watch the news until 7am. Then, we’d go back to bed until noon. I slept better during the day for some reason.

I still had contractions a lot, some days worse then others. The hard part was not being able to decorate for Christmas. (Thanks to my Aunt Pam, she came up and did it for us! And cleaned!) I also couldn’t bake cookies with my mom and aunt Sandra as planned, and worst of all, I had to miss Mike’s graduation for his Masters Degree. I felt horrible about that. And, only his dad was able to make it, they canceled the Christmas plans we had made for that day, it just went from bad to worse for him. It wasn’t much of celebration for an event that should have been properly marked because it was a HUGE deal and he did a great job.

When I hit 37 weeks, my doctor took me off the meds and said if I went into labor, it was fine. We had a Level 2 Ultrasound the week before that showed that the baby was in great shape, weighed 6lbs, 12oz and the irregular heart beat was gone. The doc was confident that I would NOT make my due date and it wouldn’t be much longer.

The following week I had my first false alarm-all morning I had really intense contractions that increased to 5 minutes. Mike came home from work, we were ready to call, and what happened? They went away. On December 23rd, it happened again. This time, we were trying to decide if we should go to Rochester for Christmas. I was HELL BENT on having the holiday with my family, so we called the birthing center and they said I should just come get checked out. Yes, I was having contractions, but they weren’t producing anything so they said we should go to Rochester and enjoy our holidays. I took Tylenol that whole weekend to help the pain, and it worked and got me through.

I went back to work that week of Christmas half days. I continued to go all the following week as well, with a few days I had to stay home with a lot of pain. I was SO frustrated. I wanted this baby out. I was tired, fat, swollen, you name it. And I was tired of not knowing what was real and what wasn’t.

New Year’s Day, again, false alarm. This time we even had Dad come up and bring Madison to Mom and Barry’s. The contractions this time were close together and VERY painful. But, as the evening went on, they slowed down and finally stopped. Again, so frustrated. Madison spent the week in Rochester and I missed her terribly. I started my maternity leave on January 4th because I just couldn’t keep driving and staying comfortable. Mike and I went to my appointment on January 6th, my due date. I was still only dilated to 2cm and she set us up for appointments to check out the baby the following Tuesday. If all looked good, they would schedule an induction for January 13th.

We drove to Rochester that night to pick up Madison and had dinner with my folks. It was a nice break for me, and good to have my doggie back. We spent the weekend doing odds and ends around the house and then on Sunday I started having a severe pain in my side. At first it was just a cramp that I thought would go away, so I took a bath. But, it stayed and it got worse. By the time 6pm rolled around, I was in agony. I tried to lie down, but anytime I moved the pain was so bad I was crying. Then, I would have a contraction (remember, I had these all the time) and the pain would increase. I kept sitting in the tub, because that relieved some of intensity. Finally, Mike had me call the birthing center around midnight to see what they thought.

Unfortunately, I talked with a real bitch of a nurse who totally blew me off. I was trying to explain how bad the pain was and she just kept saying, “Well, you might be in labor, but you should just stay home as long as possible. It’s probably another false alarm.” I didn’t think I was in labor, I just knew something was wrong. So, I hung up totally frustrated and crying thinking no one believed me. It was so bad at one point, that I was on my knees on the floor and anytime Mike tried to help me up, I just couldn’t move because the pain was that severe.

I sent Mike to bed and then stayed in the tub until about 3am. Thank god for my dog. She knew something was up and stayed by my side. In the morning, Mike had me call the hospital again at which time the new nurse said YES I should could come in. Again, the same drill. They figured I either had a cyst or bladder infection. Dr. prescribed Vicodin for the pain and an antibiotic in case it was bladder related.

Vicodin had me totally gone. I mean, goooooone. I slept though, which I needed badly. The pain continued, but was now manageable. The next day we went to the doctor for a non-stress test to see how the baby was doing (all was good) and then had an ultrasound. We were amazed at how big our kid had gotten! I asked them to look to see if they saw a cyst, and it appeared that there was one. We were told all was fine with the baby and to prepare to be induced that Friday.

We had a great day. We went to the Olive Garden for lunch, to Wal-Mart, PetSmart, and just did some odds and ends that needed to be done. Little did we know that would be our last trip out on our own! We came home and I called me family and let them know the status of things. I remember distinctly saying to Lyn, my sister-in-law that I could relax and know that the baby would just be coming on Friday. It wasn’t more then an HOUR later that the real contractions started!

I totally blew them off at first. They were more intense then usual, but why should I believe they were real after all we had gone through? I went about my business and started cleaning upstairs. I hung a picture and a shelf in the baby’s room. I did laundry. About the time I was going to start cleaning the bathroom, I realized that I was having to stop what I was doing when I had the contraction. They kept getting more intense, so I sat in the bathtub again. I chatted with my brother on the phone. And around 10pm when I finished talking to him I casually mentioned that I was having some fairly strong contractions but no big deal. Pat just said, “keep us posted.”

By the time midnight rolled around, I was having some major pain. We just didn’t know what to do. Finally, Mike said to call the hospital. I think I knew at that point that this was real, but he said he didn’t. But, my luck, I got the same bitchy nurse who tried to talk me OUT of coming in. Told me it was in my head-just like the other day. She did get a little sheepish when I told her they found a cyst and that had caused all my pain. Finally I said to her through gritted teeth: “Look, I think I’m in labor. I don’t know what the hell you people want me to do.”

This seemed to catch her attention and she said we should come in. But, just to be sure, I took another bath to see if the contractions would go away. They did not. Around 2 am we put Madison in the kennel (who looked at us like we were out of our mind) and left.

The 20 minutes to the hospital were the longest of my life.

When a contraction would come, it just seemed to seize me. I wasn’t breathing correctly either, but I was doing whatever I could to get through. When we got to the ramp and parked, I had to stop three times on the way to Labor and Delivery. We were greeted by the lovely, bitchy nurse and brought to a room When she examined me, I think she was surprised to find that I was dialated to 4! Yes, I was in labor. Finally!

At this point I was shaking from the pain, so she offered me something until the anesthetist could get there to administer the epidural. Initially, I refused thinking I could hang on. About 5 minutes later I was like, get me the drugs!! Mike says that as the drug took affect (immediately) I looked like Jeff Spicoli in Fast Times at Ridgemont High. (Can we say high?)

It didn’t take the contractions away, but it made them bearable. So, with that being the case, Mike took this time to run to his work and take care of a few things. This was at 3:30am or so. I was feeling good (oh, yeah) so I told him to go. Thankfully, just a few minutes later, the doctor arrived to give me the epidural. Although you are not allowed to get out of bed while having it (makes your legs numb) and that you constantly have to be monitored with blood pressure, etc, it was a godsend.

I didn’t really sleep, but I was able to rest.

They broke my water at 6am (and I had 2 new nurses at this point that were AWESOME) and things really started to move. Suddenly, at 9am, they said I was at a 10 and I could start pushing. It really went a lot faster then I anticipated. Which was fine with me!

I just have to say that pushing was the hardest thing I’ve ever done in my life. Ever.

At one point, I said to Mike: “I can’t do this.” And I really meant it! He, however, kept telling me I could along with the nurse. Even though I had the epidural, I still could feel a lot of pressure. His head was bearing down so badly, I just wanted to get him out. I didn’t want to take a break from pushing, but the nurse kept telling me to rest in between contractions. Some of the time I did, most of the time I just kept pushing no matter what. Mike was awesome. He held my leg, told me what to do, helped me breathe, you name it.

When the doctor showed up, I couldn’t have cared less. I couldn’t even greet her! She showed up about half hour into things, and didn’t come back until 10 minutes before I delivered. It’s amazing what the nurses really do! Suddenly, they slapped oxygen on me and said one more push and the baby would be here. To be honest, I kept my eyes closed and focused all my forces in that last push. I remember one small scream escaping me, a horrible burning sensation, and then relief. The doctor said something like, “Look at this boy!” And I said:

“It’s a boy?”

Mike gave me a kiss as they put my baby on my belly and I stared in awe. We had a baby. It was an amazing moment in my life and something I’ll never forget.

When the doctor asked if we had a name, we looked at each other at the same time and said: Cameron. Then I looked at Mike and told him that I liked Patrick for a middle name, and he agreed. And so, our baby boy had a name: Cameron Patrick Lemke.

He was a lot bigger then we figured, and long too. 8lbs, 12 oz. and 22 inches long. Wow! When they gave him back to us, Mike and I just stared at him. It was so hard to believe. After all the trauma and drama of the last month, he was finally here. He was healthy and we were so happy.

The phone calls began. Low and behold, Dad was at our house letting Madison out. Mike told him that he should come to the hospital and see his new grandson. Dad was there within 90 minutes and was the first to hold him. It was a cool moment for him.

When I called Mom at work, they were all on alert and the phone was quickly passed to her! I said: “You have a grandson!” She cried, and so did I.

Uncle Pat didn’t get the call until the afternoon, unfortunately, because I didn’t have his work number with me for some odd reason. He was just as excited and as he said, honored and humbled by the middle name. We were so glad they were all able to come last week and meet him.

And so, that’s my tale. As I said, it’s been an adjustment for me in many ways. The first days home I was still running on adrenaline, as I had while in the hospital. Then, I crashed. And when I say crashed, I would have liked Tom Cruise to come over to my house to witness what ‘post-pardom’ is really all about. And yes, I quickly recognized with the help of my mom and Mike, that I needed to go back on the anti-depressants I had been taking before I was pregnant and get some rest. And guess what Mr. Cruise? It worked.

Cam is now 6 weeks old and doing great. I’m doing much better. We are all feeling more confident and learning to read him fairly well. I sincerely never thought I could be as tired as I am most of the time. When he sleeps 4-5 hours in one stretch at night, I feel like a new person! Mike & I have a lot of respect for 10 hours of sleep.

Madison is doing prettty good, but looks at us frequently like we ruined her life! She likes Cameron and is very protective of him. I think she is missing the one on one time she has had with us in the past, but is quickly learning that Cam is part of the pack now.

One last thing I have to mention: my wonderful, amazing husband gave me an iPod for an early birthday/Valentines/having a baby gift. I LOVE this thing. It’s a whole new gadget to play with and do cool stuff with. Pat and Alissa also have iPods, so they were able to show me a bunch of things when they came to visit. The coolest thing I like is the ability to download TV shows! I have 2 episodes of The Office and can’t wait to get other stuff.

I’ll try to start blogging again regularly, if I can. My days are pretty full with Cameron, so if your emails are not answered quickly, I will get to you eventually.

Thanks to all of you for your support, prayers, love, and gifts to us all. We really appreciate everything.